Things weren't going my way.
Things were breaking down, costing money, and requiring more of me than I had to give.
Keeping above water was a constant struggle.
And then, I just had enough of it.
I was tired of suffering, of feeling low, of being keenly aware of all that was wrong and wondering when good would turn the corner.
I heard a man on the radio, years ago on my way to high school. He said, "be positive and happy until 10AM and the rest of the day will take care of itself". The day was shaping up to be a truly terrible one, but I took his advice. And then, as if it was magic, at 10AM, the world suddenly became a lot easier to live in.
Let me tell you something: forced happy and and a forced positive attitude will quickly resemble the real thing. Now, life as of late has required a lot more work than just being able to give up in the morning--it became a job of forced perspective for days and days. And then, you forget you are the force behind your happiness. It just is. You just are. Happy.
And then, your mind clears, you are able to complete those tasks that once seemed too daunting to tackle, you aren't bothered by those relationships that would send your mind and heart into a tailspin at the hint of a harsh word or unreturned call, confidence in yourself and your abilities slowly but surely returns. Lists can be made and ticked off. Line items are quickly taken care of, and life itself falls into line. It falls into your line. Because you are once again in control of it.
And the happiness is yours, unabashedly acquired, fought for, and graciously granted, nay, taken.
Naturally occurring happiness has once again returned. I'm a person that needs a road. I'll create it if need be, but I need a step and I need to scheme and plan and dream about how I'll make that step work for me. I don't flounder well. After more than 2 years (one could argue 5) of floundering, I'm back in charge.
I worked hard for it, and it took an incredibly long time, but I've received a an offer on a really good job with a really good company.
Things were breaking down, costing money, and requiring more of me than I had to give.
Keeping above water was a constant struggle.
And then, I just had enough of it.
I was tired of suffering, of feeling low, of being keenly aware of all that was wrong and wondering when good would turn the corner.
I heard a man on the radio, years ago on my way to high school. He said, "be positive and happy until 10AM and the rest of the day will take care of itself". The day was shaping up to be a truly terrible one, but I took his advice. And then, as if it was magic, at 10AM, the world suddenly became a lot easier to live in.
Let me tell you something: forced happy and and a forced positive attitude will quickly resemble the real thing. Now, life as of late has required a lot more work than just being able to give up in the morning--it became a job of forced perspective for days and days. And then, you forget you are the force behind your happiness. It just is. You just are. Happy.
And then, your mind clears, you are able to complete those tasks that once seemed too daunting to tackle, you aren't bothered by those relationships that would send your mind and heart into a tailspin at the hint of a harsh word or unreturned call, confidence in yourself and your abilities slowly but surely returns. Lists can be made and ticked off. Line items are quickly taken care of, and life itself falls into line. It falls into your line. Because you are once again in control of it.
And the happiness is yours, unabashedly acquired, fought for, and graciously granted, nay, taken.
Naturally occurring happiness has once again returned. I'm a person that needs a road. I'll create it if need be, but I need a step and I need to scheme and plan and dream about how I'll make that step work for me. I don't flounder well. After more than 2 years (one could argue 5) of floundering, I'm back in charge.
I worked hard for it, and it took an incredibly long time, but I've received a an offer on a really good job with a really good company.
I'm Moving Forward. And that's all I could ever ask for.
Now its my turn, and I'll keep that momentum going, God help me.
I'm done doggy-paddling.
I'm done doggy-paddling.
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